Question for highlighting my darkness

9 years, 4 months ago by mukta singh in Personal Sadhana Reports

All glories to Sri Guruji Maharaja and Gouranga Mahaprabhu

Radha Krishna Ki Jay and Goura Bhakta Brinda Ki Jay.

I am submitting my humble obeisances unto Sri Guruji’s padmachanran and asking my darkness for highlighting that in the purport of Bhagavatam 3.25.39 here mention that “ Kuvera is one of the eight demigods who are in charge of different directions of the universe. It is said that Indra is incharge of the eastern side of the universe, where the heavenly planet, or paradise is situated. Similarly, Agni is in charge of the southestern portion ……….. and Kuvera, the treasurer of the demigods, is in charge of the Northern part of the universe.

  In this purport, it is clearly mentioned the eight demigods but written only seven who is the eight one?

            They are :       1) Indra, king of the demigods                                 -           Eastern

                                    2) Agni, in charge of fire                                          -           Southeastern

                                    3) Yama, who punishs sinners                                  -           Southern

                                    4) Nirrti  ……………..                                            -           Southwestern

                                    5) Varun, in charge of water                         -           Western

                                    6) Vayu, in charge of air                                           -           Northern

                                    7) Kuvera, in charge of wealth                                 -           Northeastern

Looking on the internet, Wikipedia, we went through three pages and got Siva as the Dig-pal for the Northwest!!

And what is the responsibility of Nirrti (4) like Varun in charge of water, Vayu in charge of air. Please highlight my darkeness.

HpS - ASA - Back to the Wikipedia!  . . . . . . .   Not much detail. She is mentioned in the Rig Veda etc. Ni = no, rta= law. So lawlessness. No more clear details.

Yours fallen servant
Yamunesvara Das

HpS - ASA - How was Narendra Modi's visit to Manipur??

R1

Todas las glorias a Sri sri Caitanya y Nityananda
Todas las glorias a srila prabhupada 
Todas las Glorias a Hanumatpresaka swami
(Maybe 3%)

Accept my humble obeisances  Gurudeva

This last friday i was in the U.S consulate in Monterrey Mexico applying for mi Religious visa. Showing myself with devotional clothes, and was an instant preach. The woman in the interview just did two questions. What you gonna do there? And are you single?. I don't show any paper just my passport, and she approved the visa! :D.

HpS - ASA - Jaya! Super'carini!!

Definitely Krishna have a plan, i don't know what it exactly is, but trying to follow your instructions I'm sure this is the right path. I want to thank you for your support with all this and i hope to do good service in Goswami Academy.

Also i want to thank to Saranga Thakur prabhu, Subra mataji, Syamasundar prabhu, deepti (lawer) and all the devotees involved.

Im chanting this last weeks my japa, but with many offenses. I pray to Krishna for less material desires, and at the same time i feel like a lier to ask for that. Forgive me Gurudeva.

HpS - Why are they "material". If you want a nice husband, nice car, nice house, nice partys, nice friends, nice babies, then.... you are in the right place. Of course, maybe you have other material desires. I kind of want my teeth to stop aching. Hole in my face where the Tommy the Tooth came out five days ago it singing a little!
You can get Vasudeva type person for a husband and then get Krsna for your baby. (Ooops one little family problem!)


Im taking time with family, and visiting old friends. My parents really like worship my Nrsihmha deva deity. (So do we!)
I come back to Houston by December first.

(Please call us after you get settled with the CCD/SDD)
 

Reading Upadesambrta and Human devolution ( M. Cremo), taking my old books from home :)

Gurudeva. Are you gonna be in Tennessee for you vyasa puja? Because some devotees in Mexico want to be with you in that special day 

Forgive my offenses
I hope your been well of health

ys
Govinda Pramodini GG 

HpS - Poor Govinda, has such a bewildering Girl Friend! And you are serving, Her!
We'll be in Tennessee, but no place to stay here. Snow and polar bears chasing rabbits, but I think we will be on line and of course send all the cookies and crackers you want. We will offer them to Vyasa-deva.

HpSwami c/o R. P. Singh et al
2129 Stratford Road
Murfreesboro, TN 37064

 

We will see you in Texas on February 18-28th, I think!  Now you are a Resident Alien!

Many Services and Bad Japa

Hare Krishna gurudeva, please accept my humble obeisances.
All glories to Srila Prabhupada!
All glories to you!

How are your health?

HpS - AGTSP!!! About the same yours will be when your donkey turns 66-years!<img alt="cheeky" height="23" src="http://www.hps.monkeywarrior.com/sites/all/libraries/ckeditor/plugins/smiley/images/tongue_smile.png" title="cheeky" width="23" />   Good preparation for death and other delights. Hope your Rathyatra is SUPER!

I want to tell you I’m very focused on service and I realized that I’m not reading and I’ve lost my concentration in my japa. I never leave to chant but I can’t chant good rounds because I’m on passion modality all the time,

  • thinking about pendings things that I have to do,
  • thinking about new things to do,
  • thinking about to preach non-devotees,
  • thinking about atitudes that I have to change,
  • thinking about attitudes that I have to improve,
  • analyzing myself to be better,
  • trying to make strong relationships, and
  • thinking about what devotees teach me with their attitudes.

I think also that If I try to act in the goodness modality like I did before, I couldn’t do all the service that I want to.

ASA - Oink! -- It's all service! [{(We will now give to you a Secret Mantra that is hiden from all the Vedas. Don't share it with anyone)}}
http://www.vedabase.com/en/sb/10/9/5

And Krishna is giving to me the opportunity to do all these service, so I can't neglects them. It’s hard to me looking for a balance. Sometimes I feel too anxious and can not focus in my japa.
I remember my spiritual master said that Krishna sees our effort even if we are not chanting good. He sees our effort to chant better. But sometimes I don’t put any effort to chant because I want to finish my rounds quick to do more service. I don’t have any taste. How can i understand this if the chanting is considered as a service to Krishna too?

HpS - Answer above, no? And how to get the BG 10.10 mentioned, there? [[[Call "Hare Krsna, Hare Rama"}}} If you chant minimum 16-nice rounds on beads then ALLL the other services will improve at the maximum possible speed!


On the other hand, I want to read again like I used to, but I can't find the time to do it.
I put all my energy in the service, sleeping little bit, and when I have a "free" moment I'm so tired, without energy that I only want to take a rest and even trying to read, I fall asleep.

How can I looking for a balance ? I'm happy doing service but I think that my whole sadhana is not the best.

I'm very happy and anxious to see you on January! :)

My respects,

Hare Krshna!

ys,

Belen.

ASA - Milk, milk to quench His thirst. Which one shall I get for Krsna first?

SHELTER

11/24/14

DEAR GURUDEV:  ALL GLORIES TO MIGHTY SRILA PRABHUPADA!!!   PLEASE ACCEPT MY DUNDAVATS AND PRANAMAS.

THANK YOU MOST SINCERELY FOR YOUR MERCIFUL ACCEPTANCE AND SHELTER.  IT WAS VERY MUCH NEEDED!  EVERY MISERY IN MY LIFE, FROM BIRTH UNTIL NOW, IS MOST DESERVED WITHOUT DOUBT.  AND, AS YOU POINT OUT, EVEN MORE RETRIBUTION IS ACTUALLY CALLED FOR.  BUT, THE SUPREME LORD IS MERCIFULLY MITIGATING MY JUST DESERTS; EVEN APPLYING THEM WHERE, WHEN AND HOWEVER THEY WILL HAVE THE MOST PURIFYING EFFECT.  THIS I KNOW TO BE TRUE.

HpS - ASA - tat te nukampam susamiksamano

bhunjana evatam krta vipakam

hrd, vag, vapubhir, vidadhan  . . . 

......  daya bhak.

can't remember the rest!   Let's look it up!    {{{Vedabase.com [[[Search....}}    Got it!
http://www.vedabase.com/en/sb/10/14/8
Verse for the Heart.   Prayers of Lord Brahma. . . Just for all the lost Yoginis!!!  Whos depth is taken but worth unknown.

HAVING SAID THAT, IT IS STILL TRUE THAT I KEEP GOING AND GROWING ONLY BECAUSE OF THE SUBLIME PROCESS OF KRSNA CONSCIOUS BROUGHT TO US BY HDG SRILA PRABHUPADA, AND YOUR MERCY.  THERE IS THE FEELING THAT MY LIFE ENERGY IS BEING CONSTANTLY PULLED OUT OF ME AND THAT MAKES EVERYTHING I AM TRYING TO ACCOMPLISH SO DIFFICULT.  THE ONLY PROTECTION I KNOW OF  IS THE MAHA MANTA.  I CANT ALWAYS TELL IF IT IS WORKING BUT I ACCEPT ON FAITH THAT IT IS.  THERE IS THE FEAR I WILL COLLAPSE FROM WITHIN AS THE DRAIN IS SO SEVERE AND HAS BEEN GOING ON FOR SO LONG.  BUT, IT HASNT HAPPENED YET.

HpS - Sounds like you are having good, good, good training for DEATH!!    Do what you can now to make things nice now, and to build s better platform in the future.

HOUSE HUNTING CONTINUES IN ORDER TO HAVE NUCH NEEDED MORE SQ. FOOTAGE AND TO HOPEFULLY BE CLOSER TO ASSOCIATION IN SAC AND FOLSOM.

HpS - ASA --- Nanda Bobba and the other Vraja-vasis had the same problems!
http://www.vedabase.com/en/sb/10/11/21

WHAT ARE YOU LEARNING AND BENEFITTING FROM IN YOUR JUNG READING?
 

HpS - ASA - Thank you so much for the question. Following Srila Prabhupada's indication in "Dialectial Spiritualism" we seem to have found the community with "the most sense of all of them" in the Western world. We are just about to write a very well considered Letter of Introduction and Proposal of Co-operation to Sonu Shamdasani and The Philemon Foundation. Of course, it will be published here and on such secondary Blogs as Dandavats also.

I PURCHASED A SET OF DVD'S OF SRILA PRABHUPADA WITH YEARS OF FILM FOOTAGE FROM MATCHLESS GIFTS UNTIL HIS DEPARTURE TO THE SPIRITUAL WORLD.  ITS IS VINTAGE AND SUBLIME!  WHAT HAS REALLY STRUCK ME SO FAR (AND IVE JUST BEGAN TO WATCH IT) IS HIS ENDLESS PATIENCE WITH THE MOTLEY CREW OF YOUNG PEOPLE WHO FLOCKED TO HIM.  I KNOW HE IS AS PATIENT WITH ME.

HpS - ASA - Ha! Ha! Enthusiasm to use them!!! Monkey warriors, addicted to fruit!

I WISH YOU WERE CLOSER SO I COULD GAIN INNER STRENGTH FROM TAKING THE DUST OF YOUR FEET.

HpS - Here we are. How's the Deva-prastha???? Is he writing, gardening? Gotta get that Old Bear out on the prowl each day!!!

I AM PRAYING FOR YOU.  PLEASE PRAY FOR ME.

HARIBOL!  YSW,

KALINDI DEVI DASI

HpS - Hare Krsna, Hare Rama!!!  Jaya Sri Vrndavana Dhama! Stay with us!! It is actually a short journey to the next port!!

This title is completely random

Dear Gurumaharaja,
Please accept my humble obeisances.
All glories to Srila Prabhupada.

I hope this letter meets you in good health and good spirits. It's been a while since i last wrote you. In my last letter i wrote that Benelux council cancelled the magazine, and that i felt like dropping the service that would follow. After writing you, i decided that would be very childish and i decided to do whatever came up. Besides that, i filed a complaint against the impersonal tactic of making decisions without asking input from those involved, and because of that the council decided to keep the magazine on for one more year to see how things developed. That was interesting.

     HpS - ASA - AGTSP paoho.  Very nice to hear from you!!!  How is your family?  Also very nice to hear about your dealings with the Administration and the magazine. Paper copy magazine? On-linne Blurb?   Seems little paper copy by someone in parallel with the the E-zine, no? Best damn periodical in Europe! People clammering to submit articles.

The Benelux yatra is in heavy weather. Amsterdam Temple council was disbanded, and it is almost like a rudderless boat. Temple activities are going on but several groups of people have different ideas (some have only those, without helping practically). Deity worship is faltering, that is main concern for most people. With the upcoming obligation to move (August 2015) these are challenging times. I don't feel like involving myself in any way, because the list of people who got fried is endless. So is the list of people from the old days who got together again recently and are willing to do something for Srila Prabhupada. That is brewing. Time will tell what will happen.

HpS - Do what you can. This movement depends on you!

The Nama hatta's are also experiencing bad communication, and lack of strong and present national leadership is said by many to be the reason, also for Amsterdam. 

Myself I experience dry times. I had a 5 day 64 rounds retreat during kartik, and that brought me much good, but at home i struggle to get up early and chant with gusto. Some days i've missed my rounds. Caught up pretty much everything, but i go through a drought. In my own leading kirtan also, the substance feels like missing. In our family i am the only one doing sadhana right now, and i feel like Srila Bhaktivinode Thakur, when he is singing:

ekākī āmāra, nāhi pāya bala,
hari-nāma-sańkīrtane
tumi kṛpā kori', śraddhā-bindu diyā,
deho' kṛṣṇa-nāma-dhane

One thing i learned after the retreat was done, was the enormous clarity i had and penetrating power of mind. It dawned on me that generally your classes from Hawaii, for the most part, seem to fly right over my head. This frustrates me. It is humbling.

The Journey Home book translation is halfway, so far so good. It's a personal struggle, and that is good. Of course, my drought will also change, as things tend to do usually, but in the meantime i have not much else to share. Family life had some big hills to climb, but this yajna is so necessary and i'm happy to get the chance. But in general, i think the main topic is that i'm an external devotee, wanting to get more internal and realistic, but struggling to do so. I guess i should see for a bigger timeframe where to see things in, accept things as they are. Is there anything you can say about that, Gurudeva?

With gratitude,
Your servant in the mission of Srila Prabhupada,

Raghava Panditas dasa

HpS - AGTSP. From your letter you seem to be doing quite well. Things are tough all over. This is Kali-yuga. Do what you can to help Lord Caitanya in Mission of giving he fallens souls the science of Krsna by getting inspiration from the Param-para, Rupa-Raghunatha, Srila Prabhupada, and then when you reach your limit pray for Krsna and Rama to help! Hare Krsna, Hare Rama and they will send people. Self-motivated people.

A King for Benelux!

Yesssssssss. . .  Big Picture.   Then you don't get bewildered by the little ups and downs and lefts and rights. If your family is following the four principles then they will be inspired by whatever example you set. Shoot for nice time together in the morning and evening.

Finally, the Full-Morning-Progarm [FMP] results because we have association. That's how we are doing it. Our Buddy, our Body, says, "Just five more minutes of  szleeeeeep!!!", but our ego, says, "Hey, Buddy, everyone' gonna be on line at 4.30AM and you better have a good report and join the show!".

So, get some European partner. Call each other up. Have a conference call, daily, occasionally...

Give us more feedback on Hawaii Friday's we are trying to improve, make them part of our, your, Sankirtan!!

BG 2.9 "Govinda, I shall not fight"

Hare Krisna!!     Beloved and esteemed Gurudev,

Please accept my humble obeisances,

All glories to Srila Prabhupada,

Having met you and being able to associate with you make my life worthy. Your example, your qualities, are a huge shelter where many many many fallen souls like me can be safe. Your intelligence is so pure. You always push us beyond the limits. We only have to follow your example. So clear.

HpS - Srila Prabhupada made his generals out of mud. With us Monkeys worse than mud he has a harder time.

Here we are back in our ksetra, mar del plata city. Fighting with 16R/4P. LOVE WITHOUT LOVE, SADHANA VAIDHI BHAKTI. Hope one day we develop any taste for the holy name.

I made a vrata for kartik to chant 20 rounds but i couldnt accomplish it, so again I,m in debt, of course this brings me the realization that we will always be in debt with Guru and Krisna.

HpS - How big your debt? We got so many rounds behind from our 25/day because of that Conference in India some time ago. Still was doing 16/day but not 25. Now we have caught up to 92. We will follow your example and catch up.  Main thing is getting up early and then chant, read, write . . . Is nice. Peace comes and nice plans for service.

The visit to Peru was super, met with so many nice devotees, shared very nice moments with mother CMDD and of course Sri Sri Radha Madhan Bihari.

We met with mother and sister of CMDD, Ullyses who was always eager to knock me down, and felt very good, such nice people.

We have been in Patrak's prabhu Birthday and visited Ayurvedic doctor Rupanuga das. Then we were talking with LAD about expanding Nimsar to Argentina, and different devotees at Wilson Mandir.

We have improved a lot our deity worship thanks to the advices of mother CMDD.

OUR fixed services are Bhakti vriksa program on mondays, BG class for B vriksa students on wednesdays, Bhakti Sastri, now ISO, Memeber of the local comitee AND recently i'm in charge of the local BBT. I always attend our sunday feast at El Loft. Sadhu sanga ki jay!!

Two months ago i moved SAMA our health center, we are motivated with this new space.

My relationship with my kids is very good, they live with me three days a week, and also i have very polite relation with their mother, peace.

My biggest challenge is my work as a doctor. Balance it with devotional service. I often feel is too much, so many people demanding from me, and most of my patients are women which have a negative effect for my spiritual practice. It drags a lot of energy from me and then i can not have a good sadhana. Often i feel like Arjuna wanting to go to the forest to meditate. But i know i can not escape from my nature.

It is frustrating not to have the spiritual practice i would like to have.

I pray, i struggle to have a fixed sadhana like yours gurudev cause i'm sure that is the solution to every affliction.

I know it is a fact but i have so much material desires that my passionate mind is always pushing me away from that goal. 

I have already bought my tiket to chile, arrive friday january 30th in the morning and leave monday february 2nd in the afternoon.

kṛṣṇa se tomāra, kṛṣṇa dīte pāro,

tomāra śakati āche

āmi to' kāńgāla, 'kṛṣṇa' 'kṛṣṇa' boli',

dhāi tava pāche pāche

Running behind you, trying to reach your divine lotus feet.

Nikunja Bihari Das.

HpS - Talk with other devotees, take advantage of people like CMDD and figure out how to do your medical service. Maybe less patients. Train others. You have a unique challenge.

What was the result of your meeting with Rupanuga?

When do you get your rounds done each day?????