Waking up, truly...
October 19, 2025
Dear Maharaja Hanumat Presaka Swami,
pamho ,agtsp.
I had a most intense nightmare/dream last night. We were staying in Saint Augustine, managed to seize a day for some needed rest & relaxation. I had a very lethargic start upon arrival, was like sleep-walking after the drive over from High Springs. I was attempting to do Gayatri at the hotel and my head was bobbing with slackened consciousness.
So, angrily, I grabbed our “Sand bucket” (small cart for beach junk), and we quickly set-up camp on the beach. Basically, pouring out the chairs & umbrellas from the sand bucket, I turned & took an immediate trip to the marginal portion of the beach and offered pranams and salutations to our dear Atlantic Ocean. Then walking in, I offered water back to the ocean in respect, kept walking and finally a wave came as prasadam to dive into.
Getting a few strokes in, I navigated the water and immediately got out. The real purpose was to get awakened and some purification in to refresh my Gayatri, than my last lazy attempted effort. It did pay off, my mind was quelled and intelligence more in focus. Just stood at the marginal points and continued the mantra till complete. Was wonderful, did a few stretches and kata moves afterwards, then proceeded to conclude today’s japa on the fragile beach chair. Chanting was much clearer and resounding after the bathing experience and I felt much more confident about it.
Now, finishing 16 rounds, the rest of the time was just nurturing our splayed efforts to regroup and recover again. Feeling, maybe, a bit too proud as we packed up and returned to our temporary abode, we unloaded and freshened up in our room, then we proceeded to view a television program. We’ve been watching a classical production called the “The Chosen,” in between our Damodarastika prayers, house maintenance and daily routines.
This series depicting Lord Jesus time lines with His Disciples and followers is quite definitive and personal. You can almost feel the Lord’s capricious sobriety. Some good acting from all the characters, this episode concluded emotions from the sermon on the mound and the clashing of egos amongst the Romans and Pharisees, while deciding what exactly to do with Sri Jesus’ profound preaching and enlightening’s. Meanwhile, Lord Isha (Jesus), is iterating instructions to all his 12 followers that they are all now His disciples. The interpersonal reactions are astounding. It is like when Srila Prabhupada’s giving instructions to Sanyasi’s in His movement. Parallels abound. While the mission statements are delivered each disciples has to confront their sincerity, more to come.
Back to my dream world experience, proceeding after the evening of our Sunshiny day. I was up early, and finished my rounds, virtually attended Mangal Arotika and we sang all the songs, was most satisfied with the morning. While waiting for the sunrise I laid down for a moment, closed my eyes and... Pop! I’m in another world. A World crazier than some of our own 3rd world countries, was similar to an mixed industrial-motel neighborhood in Delhi I walked, while waiting for a flight at the airport. When in Delhi I was lucky, I had a walking stick, and sure enough some dogs started grouping around me. Spinning the cane I created enough whistling wind to back the dogs off, in my dream I was alone with no defense.
As dreaming continued, groups of people and individuals wondering and some seating eerily dank city street scene, as I tried relocate my bearings after being dropped off from a friends (?) car. Had no phone, no luggage or much of anything else, was just hoofing as one might say. As I further walked around looking for landmarks or any reference points, I’d find one and enter and the scenery would morph or creature (human?) would redirect. The streets had young children seeking drugs, dealers eying me and offering stuff, young beggars would wrap their arms around me, some tried to bundle my body with large canvas sleeve. For some reason I did find my ol’ pocket knife (no Swiss army) on my hip belt and started to cut myself free. Then looked towards the light and awoke to the actual dawn.
Back to the waking World, completed Gayatri before Sunrise, and contemplated the illusory trip. Not once in this macabre illusion did I chant God’s name, nor seek any refuge, my battle was my own and am now sensing I’m not fully applying my transcendental trainings. It is that I feel if I’m not in immediate danger, I shouldn’t disturb the Lord in my calamities, yet one thing leads to another. As Srila Prabhupada has said, “You Westerner’s don’t fear Maya enough.”
What I’ve surmised is past and present are still mixing and I need more focus, as I started at the ocean. My sincerity is not purified enough and duplicity is now cresting. The influence of Christ’s disciple’s apprehension in His mission statements is about parallel with my own surrender.
The best recovery is keeping the association of devotee’s and the continuity of my dharma, this will prevail the material coverings. Was fortunate to go to the annual UF Ratha Yatra at the main campus and complete the parade, a bit different than the SFRY, it was a non-distribution event, a school show for the advanced students (they just didn’t know how advanced they’re getting), and Brahmacari’s. I was pacing myself, the event parade is about 2 hours, pre and post adds about 90 minutes.
My drumming is 2nd rate and the hand strokes are limited, I just kind of filled in where my beat would be in synchronicity. After a while my arms were flailing, so I passed my drum on to the next devotee and into the dance modes, the “Old Man” dance mode. Just kept up and flowed as gracefully or wild as needed... kind of mood swings of a crazy man, I guess. All in all, I know now it’s ok to stand back and follow along at a pace and live to do more Hari Nama’s.
That’s it for now, we’ll be in touch again... God willing!
HpS/ASA - Hare Krsna!
On and on and on.
Interesting.
More and more chanting.
More and more.
Thank you for the news.
Look forward to more.
