Hare Krsna Gurudeva,
Please accept my obeisances and forgive my offenses,
All the glories to Srila Prabhupada.
First of all, I wanted to say that your arrival to Chosica was very helpful for many of us, I wanted to tell you that I will strive to develop the necessary qualities such as patience, punctuality and cleanness. About the initiation, I personally believe that is a difficult decision to make for some authorities because I am still young and somewhat immature, so this situation has encouraged me to improve faster, is not easy for me sometimes but I will try to do my best. I have started reading the Nectar of Instruction again, but this time in English!
HpS - ASA -- Then Hindi!
Moreover, I have a little doubt about your answer to my last letter, was about: duty, asrama and marriage. Being single has not been a problem for me all these years, and that’s principally because of the education I received from my parents and all the classes You Gurudeva! have given here in Chosica when I was a child, I remember that I felt that Your words were instructions for me and me spiritual sisters. So I have always tried not to disappoint You and my parents, and to be honest I think Sita Ram Lakshmana Hanuman have helped me in this process, I have like a pact with my father and is something like if someone tells me or asks me about marriage or something, I will have to answer that my father is making all the arrangements and any doubt about it could be answered by my father… I think it was something like that, fortunately I haven’t had the opportunity to say it. Well my doubt was about this, because I know marriage is my duty and is going to happen in the near future, but I don’t have idea about how is going to happen, I mean I am not planning to hang out with many devotees and then realize who is the right one, however some astrologers have told my father that there is no worry about my marriage, that there is no need about fixing my marriage with a devotee because is already done, something about destiny. So this has helped me to develop a confidence in Krsna, but still I have to say that this confidence is not completely sincere, but is more like afraid. Is this good?, are there some things that I must consider?... I am praying to Sita Ram, Krsna Balarama and Radhe Shyam to help me in this process.
HpS - ASA -- We, ASA, cannot say too much since we are all Brahmacari here in the ASA Comando, so you and your father, mother, brother... need to look for help from good Grhasthas. We all need Ashrama gurus. I can be a good Ashrama guru for Sannyasa candidates. Even then it is for a certain type of Sannyasis, American Sannyasis, if we want to get very specific.
Canakya pandita: Victory come from good advice and good advice comes from many counselorss.
Focus on your place in Srila Prabhupada's, Lord Caitanya's, movement and then your Varna-ashrama requirements will follow easily. You can see, your father and mother have a relationship in terms of their service in ISKCON.
Also, this is Kali-yuga, so we should not expect too much perfection in our marriage situation. Best use of a bad bargain, but if we look at our partners as devotees this can be a lot of fun.
So, not putting too much faith in astrologers only, its Kali-yuga, I hope your parents, brother et al, can help making arrangesments for a nice Grhastha ashrama for you. There are many nice boys also looking for partners.
Next week is Radhastami, and there is going to be a painting contest, I hope I can do a good job painting her beautiful and spiritual form!
HpS - If you are sincere She will let Her beauty pass through you. Even there are 25-winners that still would not be enough to give us a glimpse of Radharanis love for Krsna, no?
I hope not to disturb and I also hope You are fine!, que el Señor Nrsmha Deva lo siga protegiendo Gurudeva! Hare Krsna!
Su aspirante a sirvienta,
Sita Lalita devi dasi.
HpS - Thank you!!! Send us more news as you have time!