mixed feelings urgent

6 years, 5 months ago by candra108_mukhi in Personal Sadhana Reports

Hare Krsna Beloved Gurudeva

AGTSP ¡¡¡ Pamho

I am really sad and worried whenever you post something about your eyes L

Well, all of us are facing different challenges, my mom is so so, even if she looks healthy, her cancer is advancingL, she has lost lots of weight, but she still chants her rosary, prepare breakfast, lunch for us, she is vegan now, well not strictly she sometimes drink some food that contains milk…, but no meat since a long time.

Last Friday she was in the hospital she was bleeding (breast bleeding), she is stable now. We are very worried and sad L. She and I are dreaming with mother Mary, she requests roses, for me is strange the 2 of us has the same dream.

I have mixed feelings.. Nowadays I earn better money than before, more responsibilities, I am learning a lot, but I do not perform much devotional service L, pujari once a month in Wilson, I can not go to chosica maybe in August I will have some free time. I give BS classes and pada Padma for just one student Jiyada Nrismha Prabhu, he is too patient with me. Sometimes I have to suspend the classes

I was very touched by the part of Guru Tattva when U wrote “Not misrepresent Srila Prabhupada”, I have the feeling that I am not doing much, for U for SP, for Krsna L. What can I do to serve U Gurudeva?

I am taking long distance workshops “gem therapist”, my master is teaching us new techniques.

We hope to get some service when U came to Peru on September 24th. (Art the sacred, or other practical service)

Thank U all so much for all your patience

Your useless servant

Candramukhi dd

ASA - AGTSP.   paoho.    This world is no more real than a motion picture, Lord of the Rings, The Hobbit... You are watching it while Krsna and the Gopis are looking at you and softly calling, "Candra, Candra", and mildly laughing and smiling. It is so silly, but it happens some times, somebody gets caught by the Bahiranga shakti. It is like one flower in the field of flowers in Goloka. We are staring at it.

"Candra!    Candra!!   Wake up!   !"

Who is your mother, who is your sister, who is . . .    Suddenly Maya hits you with an intense arquitypal image of power and conquest.  She gives you the intelligence to understand how you can quickly rise up and dominate Peru and the universe.

If we are chanting good rounds (four principles strict (full morning program (bhajan, kirtan, SB, Puja))). Then we are Sankirtan devotees. We won't be carried away by Maya's tricks, temptation.

You, your mother,  your sister, your dog, your church, your....    school....    all have to wake up.

         Do it now??

Then we can play with the puppets for Sankirtan. Krsna needs us, now?

Whatever position we are in, by Krsna's mercy, we can preach. Maybe you will preach pantheism, "Isn't the sunshine wonderful today!", or mysticism, "Yes, Ouija boards can really give us valid perspectives!" or monotheism, "Yes, in Krsna consciousness we also see that God is a person", but there is no person who is outside of the perspective of the SB.

Krsna has put you in touch with your family, church, teachers, student et al. Now just become more skillfull at helping them wake up, as fast a possible.

     Hare Krsna, Hare Rama.

That is the best service we can do.

Thank you!

Hare Krsna!!!

More results soon!