HPS Blog

6 years, 2 months ago by Andrea Ramirez in Personal Sadhana Reports

Dear Maharaja Accept my most humble obeisances at your lotus feet !!

All Glories to Srila Prabhupada!

All glories to Sri Gauranga Nityananda Ram!

I'm doing much better since i wrote you the last letter. My sadhana is improving as well and attending to Mangal Aarti has healed me up so much. My boyfriend broke up with me because he doesn't want to get married and he blames on me that we both broke principles and after all he says he is confused and he doesnt know what he wants right now, he says im crazy, controlling and bossy (which might be true, except for the being crazy part) (he is also a devotee, with the second initiation) ... he also keeps coming back to say he is sorry and he wants me back, that he loves me and he is trying to reach me with mellow words but his behavior has taken me to be exhausted, he comes and goes as he pleases, and he keeps acting in very disrepectfull ways towards me, and i don't want to be disrupted by anything right now, i want to keep focus on recovering from what i did, which i still feel ashamed about so i decided to stay away from him and all the troubles that being with him bring to my spiritual path.

HpS - Wow! AGTSP Sounds exhausting, like raising and family and keeping two jobs. You're right: Just chant Hare Krsna and Krsna will adjust all these things so everyone is happy.

It was hard for me to come out with the truth about breaking principles but it was also very relieving.

HpS - Here is good just to discuss things in a general sense and go into details with devotees you know more closely.

I think that in order to become close to the lord i have to be sincere, because no matter hiding the truth, the consequences will still be there, so there is no point for lying or trying to hide things. i appreciate every single of your kind words and ask for nothing but forgiveness.

HpS - We remember that Rama told Laksmana, that there is no mistake we can make that we cannot correct. We just have to do it.

I get up between 2 and 3 am to chant my 16 rounds, and I'm also chanting extra rounds. i get up, chant my rounds, sing Sri Nrsimha's aarti then do a reading of the Bhagavad Gita. this i have been doing for a week now. i want to make this my daily routine. I'm doing my daily service at the temple and attending to mangal aarti, Bhavagad Gita and Bhagavatam classes and Sadhya aarti. two weeks ago we went to the city to do Harinam and Sankirtan and i did Sankirtan for the first time! very beautiful experience!! looking forward on going on HarinamSankirtan again!

i want to thank you for taking time to write and guide me thru all of this constant fighting between who i was, who i am and who i shall become in order to serve to the lord as a sincere and humble devotee.

I'm looking forward into moving to Peru because economically speaking I'm not doing so well here in Panama. migratory laws are really hard on us Venezuelans, because of the political condition back there. everybody is running out of the country and moving to many different countries, there in Peru they are giving us humanitary help. All glories to Peru and Peruvians!!!

How are monkey, piggy and scientist doing? How are you dear maharaja? how are you feeling lately? how is your health? let me know if everything its good and also if it's not! i'll appreciated a lot hearing from you.

HpS - We struggle just like you. We are maybe two steps ahead of you and maybe less sincere. Keep readin this Blog and the Kapi-dhvaja and we try to post our news here. Yes! Be enthusiastic, but also patient.

thank you for being my guidance in this path dear Maharaja!

i hope to hear from you soon !!! HareKrishna!!!

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