Hare Krsna Gurumaharaja
Please accept my humble obeisances
All gflories to Srila Prabhupada !!

I have not written you for some time, this year my letters have not been very frequent and I apologize for that. This year has been important in many aspects: issues such as the role of men and women in marriage, false renunciation, celibacy and control of the senses, devotional service in grhastha asrama and mundane work, surrendering and other matters have been murky, but now they have become more understandable. 

The artificiality with which we assume these commitments were very negative and brought confusion and pain for a while. On one hand, we are very ignorant in certain subjects, on the other, there is a lot of information out there and does not always come from devotees who have realized positively these issues.

There are also no well-established programs of devotee care or counseling for couples. Many of us live our process in isolation. Indira sakti and I want to be devotees and little by little we have gone finding answers to our doubts. Thank God, by reading your letters again and again, by reading the books of Srila Prabhupada and by hearing classes of exemplary devotees on the Internet we could find gold. Today we are better, the component of happiness in our process it seems to bloom discreetly, at last.

HpS - So, lets develop nice educational programs for Grhasthas.

On the other hand, I think I have found the service that best fits me in the present conjuncture of the yatra. For 8 months we have been serving the deity in Wilson's pujari and it has been a great experience. There's a lot what to learn. We really like to wake them up because the deities are more eloquent at that time, it is also a silent, intimate and solitary service, although very intense. Japa seems firm. My readings are kept systematically; in addition to Bhakti sastri with LAD, we are translating and studying  the study guide of Gauranga Priya Prabhu.

Also I am reading the complete work of the Prabhupada Lilamrta and scientific dissemination texts like Emergence by Steven Johnson that is about the theory of self-organization or about how to develop massive complex behavior from individual,  simple behaviors (ants? neurons? cities?)

HpS - Ha! Ha!  But Rome was started by two complex individuals, no?

In relation to  service, we have been gathering with  Karuna Krsna prabhu and Yugala Kisora mataji  for the coordination on education but we have not been able to do much. It seems that the National Board does not think that Yugala mother and I should be part of this commission, they would prefer other devotees more close to them. 
Working with prabhu Karuna Krsna. For now, under KKD instruction, we are working on a intellectual level, writing articles related to educational development issues. KKD is working on topics related to VAD and I prepare an article on the mechanics of learning, entitled "Learning to learn". When it's ready, I'll sent it to you so  you can kindly give me your opinion, Gurudeva.

I say goodbye with optimism because the problems are getting solved, maybe not at the pace we want, but we are improving.

I take advantage of the circumstance to ask you a question: Krsna seems permanently to expand His experience of pleasure, however, he is completely self-satisfied. Where does that longing for pleasure come from, or rather, how can being full satisfied give rise to a desire?

HpS - I think it was Goethe who said, "In desire I lack all fulfillment, and in fulfillment I lack all desire", but with Krsna let us say that part of His complete satisfaction is the knowledge that He still has desires. It is so satisfying to finish the job but then know that another job is just now coming. It is a matter of tasteful arrangments of desire and satisfaction that would be  hard to accomodate in a purely Euclidean Space, so maybe we have to include Polar Geometry as well. Ha!  Ha!    (Or even higher spaces lile Braja).

I hope your health is improving, Gurudeva.
I hope to see you soon.

Your servant
Gandharva dasa

ASA - Yeah!    You discuss so many things that we cannot respond to all of them. Even half of them. Write more often in smaller portions.
In general it seem good that your conclusion is to still be working with SRILA PRABHUPADA's Iskcon. Make it your own personal responsibility.