Radhe!

10 years, 8 months ago by Bhaktin Camila R. in Other

  All Glories to Sri Sri Gour Nitay
All Glories to Srila Prahupada
All Glories to you! 

Maharaj, please accept my sincere obeisances at your lotus feet.

                    HpS - ASA -- AGTSP!  Lunatic feet!

I hope your health is well. 

                            And we yours!  Best use of a bad bargain!

Well, yes, there are some people that is trying to do that, to preach love...to God, to everybody. But certainly i don't have any idea about the internal bhajan of everyone, just I don't feel loved in the temple, I don't feel that i'm in a community, maybe the problem is me. The last time I was in the temple, was in Rama Navami celebration, I left the temple with so much sadness, cause i haven't feel happy, I can't see devotee care. Is so painfull, cause that day I went to the temple of Vrinda, and everyone was so happy ! (maybe i see the grass more green in the neighbourhood backyard) I was remembering everytime Srila Prabhupada, and I was remembering you, and your teachings...¡In Vrinda! Wow, that thing shocked me. Maybe it was a bad idea going there, but i have to be sincere and tell you about this things. 

I think they are following Prabhupada,  principles, japa, deity worship and Kirtan. I don't want to think that they aren't.

          HpS - ASA - From what Paramadvaiti Swami told me personally they only have to chant like four rounds and follow one of the four principles for initiation. Of course they may follow more. I don't know too much details.

I don't know, like I said before, i don't know the internal bhajan and sadhana of every devotee. 

I don't know how I can respond to the question about if they match or how they match with the five text of NoI. I'm in such a low level, i'm so fallen, and a I am a  supreeme kanista adhikari, that I cant said anything about those vaisnavas. They are vaisnavas, they are chanting hare krishna, trying to follow spiritual life, I don't want to say bad things, or even think bad things about them. Just, I want to let you now, that i'm not feeling happy in Iskcon Chile, that i'm feeling so sad, with so much anger inside...sometimes people said to me: "lets go to the temple" and i don't want to, I don't wanna go there, makes me unhappy.

                 HpS - ASA -  Wow! Seems you have so much anger toward the devotees there???   That is a sign of a lot of knowledge and attachment for the situation. We only hear this from you good self. I know that ISKCON is crazy. We heard it from Prabhupada's lips, but most other organizations are more crazy.  Hmmmm!  You should visit because it is Prabhupada's Temple and to see the Deities and to visit your particular friends and avoid other stuff.
That is devotee care, no? Unless you offer care for the devotees like that, then how can you criticise care of others???

And I really don't know what to do with that, I feel so in the dark, and lost.  The only thing that I do is to pray for the mercy of Lord Krishna, praying: "please, please Krsna, don't let me forget you, I want to remember you, please Krishna, don' t let me go...keep me there, with you" . 

I really don't want to bother you. Please forgive me , but i have this feelings in my heart...  What can I do ?
Also, forgive my bad english, I will improve it. 

Thanks you, Maharaj, for reading this. I really appreciate all the things you do. I bow at the dust! of your lotus feet, again and again. 

 

HpS - ASA -- You have to have a few friends in the Temple community or else all rest does not mean so much. They are all mean, exploitive and crazy???