Hare Krishna, Maharaja, please kindly accept my most humble obeisances;

ASA - 🐵 . . 🐒🐒 Paoho.... !

all glories to Srila Prabhupada;

ASA - ❗❗❗

all glories to your good self for your wonderful service to Prabhupada and Sri Krishna. After having read your response to my last letter, I gave some thought to your advice to come down to Houston for a short retreat. I have reservations for a flight to Houston to visit you during your Vyasapuja celebration, but out of a sense of trepidation I have purchased it with the option of being able to cancel it.

I can't explain the reason(s). It's like I am afraid of feeling unwelcomed all over again; afraid of feeling left out of the ecstacy that should be there when celebrating Vyasapuja.

HpS/ASA - Hmmm. For us it is a chance to glorify Vyasadeva and the Parampara: Krsna,

Radha,

Lord Caitanya,

Six Goswamis,

Narottama Das Thakura,

Gaudiya Vaisnavas,

Srila Prabhupada Bhaktisiddhanta,

Srila Prabhupada, A. C. Bhaktivedanta!,

ISKCON,

Me and You,

Our disciples = Whoever is following our discipline in following Srila Prabhupada's discipline.

In 'NoI' we always remember SP saying that devotional service is not a matter of imaginative ecstasy nor sentimental speculation, rather practical activity in the forefront of spiritual life.

Wow.

Work!

Please come and join, lead, us in the work!!

🙂

My wife and I are still dealing with some fallout. Not a day goes by when I am not dwelling on what happened. Still, we are managing to stay connected with those devotees whom we still have friendship: few though they may be.

My sadhana has taken a big hit. I have not been able to rise early in the morning like I used to due to despondency.

ASA/HpS - We Remember Srila Prabhupada Saying (WRSPS) that Maya's big weapon at the time of death is depression, despondency. I remember Vaisesika Das say, citing, "Don't become a vicitim". Introspection: Did I do something wrong to deserve some chastisement???

a) if I did, then there is not mistake we can make that we cannot correct (Sri Rama to Laksmana).

b) if I did not, then it is a mistake by the chastiser, material world, and I will try to help them, with KRSNA's help. I am not the target. they are chastising something about me that stimulates, fear/anger in them. etc. 🌴

These days I am up by 6AM, if I am lucky; and that means my Mangala Arotika is not until 6:30. Daily readings from Srimad Bhagavatam is not so daily, but I try to keep up my attendance in the Bhagavatam classes from Hawaii.

My japa is splayed out throughout the day, thanks in part to my work as a driver for Uber; but still I am chanting every day and observing the four regs.

ASA - Wars are not won by intact soldiers who never take a wound, nor never fall down. They are won by wounded soldiers who show the world how to get back up again and go back into the fight against The Evil One and His Companions, with a wounded body! 🌴

I just concluded my observance of Damodara prayers, and returned the Murti of Yashoda Damodara to Their place on the bookshelf next to Lord Nrishinghadeva and Sita Rama, Lakshmana and Hanuman murties.

I don't wish to sound like I am overstepping my low level of puny realizations, but this year, as with previous years, when I have chanted the last round of Damodara prayers, when I have lit the last candle for offering, and returned Yashoda Damodara to Their place on the bookshelf, there is a sadness that is felt: as if I am saying goodbye until next year, although I see Them every single day.

I would be lost without Deity worship in our home.

I guess I am very attached to the very process ofDeity worship here: even if for no other reason than I would be completely scared and lost without it.

I still have online Bhagavad gita classes on Tuesdays, and I try to attend online Bhagavad gita classes from Hawaii every Wednesday and Friday evenings.

I perform evening arotika nightly, which is only a Dhupa Arotika.

It's not so easy because of my days of driving around for Uber, but still I do it because it is my protection.

I have been distributing books to passengers and preaching, when the occasion allows it.

Some passengers are really grateful, as they are needing to hear something that gives them hope and direction in life.

Most are just curious and open minded, but into doing their own thing.

My preaching through IPM devotional correspondence with inmates continues, but it is not so easy.

I don't always have the stamina to take time out to write to them, since writing is not a skill that I am blessed with.

ASA - 🐷 🐵 📿

Same for us! Thank you!

Still, it is an opportunity to preach, and I need all the opportunities I can get; so I read their letters, and try to make time to preach to them in my replies to their letters.

I will close here, hoping to get your blessings and association soon. Please kindly forgive me for being such a weak and nonsensical devotee: Hare Krishna.

Your lowly servant,

Sriman Balabhadra dasa

HpS - ASA - Jaya Balabhadra! Jaya Balabhadra Das!!! Hope to see you soon! Hear from Srinivasa Das that you are talking with him about accomodations.

Problems with the family, problems with the community, church, government, enviroment. 'kalu dose nidhe rajan...'