Hare Krsna Dear Gurudeva
Por favor acepte mis humildes reverencias.
Todas las glorias a Srila Prabhupada!!!
Acabo de recibir su mensaje de WhatsApp. Le agradezco mucho que se tome un tiempo para preocuparse por nosotros.
Ahora tenemos un mejor plan de datos, suficiente para soportar la conexión en Gootomeeteng…
Pero no quiero incomodar a nadie ahí con los chismes que giran a mi alrededor. Estoy tomándome un tiempo prudente para volver a conectarme a sus programas. Los sigo por Facebook en tiempo diferido, y no completos, porque para ser sincero aún no me repongo del hecho de no poder estar ahí sirviendolo…
Estoy sintiéndome muy ansioso por estar en asociación con devotos, extraño el Kirtan, Harinam… Las clases ya las había dejado de dar desde hace varios meses…
Estoy cantando mis rondas diariamente... Pero me falta mucho la asociación… Y apesar de saber que los verdaderos amigos son muy, muy pocos, siempre considero que los devotos son mi familia, y me siento mal de estar lejos de ellos…
Me estoy refugiando en el Santo Nombre en japa, y escucho Kirtan, o hago un poco aquí… Pero no es igual como cuando estás con los devotos…
Escuche unos chismes desafortunados sobre mí, pero he decidido quedarme callado… Y solo responder a quien me pregunte…
Los verdaderos amigos siempre preguntan, menos mal…
De todos modos no quiero hablar públicamente de ese tema, no mucho por mí, sino por aquellos involucrados a quienes les pueda afectar… Hice una promesa de quedarme callado y aceptar todo, y solo contarle mi verdad a Ustted, y algunos, como lo hice en la carta que le envié… Estoy tratando de que mi ego no aflore y responder lo mínimo, y quedarme callado, incluso si fuera injusto o no sea verdad lo que se dice… Intentaré superarlo… Me repito constantemente que soy responsable completamente de esta situación, eso me ayuda a tolerar lo que venga… Y lo que menos quiero es afectar más a todos los que les afecto esta situación…
He pensado mucho en dejar Iskcon, dejar Perú, este cuerpo, pero el tiempo, Arjuna, Margie, y Karuna me están ayudando mucho a superar esos complejos mentales…
Pero no se que voy a hacer… Usted tiene alguna idea para nosotros?
Me siento extraño buscando trabajo, pensando en hacer algún negocio, o un lugar para radicar...
Planifique mi vida para estar estos años con Usted… Soy conciente de haberlo arruinado… Quizás me quedé chance para poder estar en Vrndavan con Usted… a menos que Usted me sugiera otra cosa… Nosotros pensamos hacer todo lo posible para encontrarlo en Vrndavan…
Por ahora hemos decidido solo "respirar" quizás pronto aparezca un buen plan.. Y cuando tengamos fuerzas de nuevo, empezaremos a colectar para los pasajes a India…
No creo tener la pureza para ir a Goloka en esta vida, pero cada vez estoy más seguro de que este mundo material es un lugar muy incómodo para estar… Muchas gracias por toda su ayuda, todos estos años…
Su aspirante a sirviente AmD.
Hare Krsna Dear Gurudeva
Please accept my humble obeisances.
All glories to Srila Prabhupada !!!
HpS - Hare Krsna! So nice to hear from you. FMP/KD PC are not the Full Morning Program/Kapi Dhvaja Priority Codes. Those are the names of the priority code. We give the FMP PC on request each morning during the FMP, and in the KDh each fortnight.
Using them as the PC is like trying to eat the word "apple" written on a piece of paper. 🙂
I just received your WhatsApp message. I really appreciate you taking the time to care about us.
HpS - AgtSP! You certainly deserve that and more!! Forgive us that we are not more sincere in serving the devotees.
Now we have a better cell phone data-plan, enough to support the connection in Gootomeeteng ...
But I don't want to bother anyone there with the gossip that revolves around me. I am taking a reasonable amount of time to reconnect to your programs. I follow them on Facebook in a delayed time, and not complete, because to be honest I still have not recovered from the fact of not being able to be there serving him ...
HpS - You can use a pseudonym like HKDas.
I am feeling very eager to be in association with devotees, I miss Kirtan, Harinam ... I had already stopped giving classes for several months ...
I am chanting my rounds daily ... But I lack association a lot ... And despite knowing that true friends are very, very few, I always consider devotees to be my family, and I feel bad being away from them ...
HpS - If we are chanting, following four principles, readin Sp's books then it is like the fruit on a tree. If it is growing healthy then that means that the root is healthy. Whatever has happened did not damage the root.
I am taking refuge in the Holy Name in japa, and I listen to Kirtan, or do a little here ... But it is not the same as when you are with the devotees ...
I heard some unfortunate gossip about myself, but I have decided to keep quiet… And only answer to those who ask me…
True friends always ask, thank goodness ...
Anyway I do not want to speak publicly about that issue, not much for me, but for those involved who may be affected ... I made a promise to keep quiet and accept everything, and just tell my truth to you, and some, as I did. in the letter I sent you ... I am trying to keep my ego from coming out and answering the least, and keeping quiet, even if it is unfair or what is said is not true ... I will try to overcome it ... I constantly repeat myself that I am completely responsible for this situation , that helps me to tolerate what comes ... And what I least want is to affect more to all those who are affected by this situation ...
I have thought a lot about leaving Iskcon, leaving Peru, this body, but time, Arjuna, Margie, and Karuna are helping me a lot to overcome those mental complexes ...
But I don't know what I'm going to do ... Do you have any ideas for us?
I feel strange looking for work, thinking of doing a business, or a place to settle ...
I planned my life to spend these years with You ... I am aware that I have ruined it ... Maybe I stayed a chance to be in Vrndavan with You ... unless you suggest otherwise ... We intend to do everything possible to find you in Vrndavan ...
For now we have decided to just "breathe" perhaps a good plan will appear soon .. And when we have the strength again, we will start collecting for the tickets to India ...
I don't think I have the purity to go to Goloka in this life, but I am more and more sure that this material world is a very uncomfortable place to be ... Thank you very much for all your help, all these years ...
Your would-be servant AmD.
HpS - Yes, we can talk a little in private, but all I have heard was just a little description of some misunderstandings in Arrequipa from Patraka Das who was asked to give some advice about the situation and was certainly everyone's friend.
Would be nice project to write down all the problems we have in the SB, and then. . . how they were solved.
If Srila Vedavyasa and Maharaja Bharata can have such problems what to speak of us, no?
You seem to be on the correct path with as much sincerity as anyone else!
We will talk with you as soon as possible.
We really need your association!!!