previous report https://monkeywarrior.com/detail/10413/
hare krsna Maharaj, PAMHO, AGTSP,
one update-- we were discussing with a devotee about verse 4.34. from that we understood that we have to follow one person whom we trust and inspired. yeah it seems for us its yo..
As you asked us to chant 4 rounds, we chanted minimum 4 rounds during these 14 days. we do feel guilty that we dropped the level from 16 rounds. we dont know what is in store for us. but as blind man follows, so do we..
moreover we found that our chanting 16 rounds were for our ego/self concept, not for your pleasure , or Srila Prabhupada or Krsna.....We have been self fish, thats the problem of when one prefers to stay alone generally. ...
everything is on plane of mind (accept/reject)..anyways thats what we found out..
you asked us "Next report tell us about how many nice gifts you got for Mataji"
we had big quarrel with Mataji (espousa) where we were very very critical. Then she stayed outside for around 12 days. Moreover what gifts we can give her, its difficult to find out.... because she wants peace over gifts. We can not give her peace because we are just hanging on somehow, not knowing where to go or what to do ( firing bullets in smog). the degree of uncertainity seems very high. only solace is that Parikhshith prabhu ji seems to be enjoy rituals of Spiritual life much more than us..
What was the benefit of the Japa vrata (if any)
japa helps us to stabilizes our vatta rog, head spinning reduces. it helps us to be on contact of Parampara.
as we have reduced japa, we are now able to hear different devotees on topic of internal strengh/ husband wife etc...crux of discussion/classes is
- people think " i need heaven for myself, i dont need to change myself much"...
- need to raise level of consciousness so that problems dont SEEM as big they are.
- live and let live...
- VDAD (vaisnava das anu das ) identity is much more important VAD(Varna asram ) identity... hope we can stay on this platform...
...............
stupid fortunate horse
HpS - Thank you. Sorry slow to answer. Traveling. Bad internet. Lot of pressure for week devotee. We will look at your next letter!
Very inspiring to hear from you. First see problems clearly.