Hare Krishna Beloved Gurudeva:

AGTSP, PAMHO

I am so sorry I am not joining FMP as I did before, things are pretty chaotic in my life. I do not sleep much. It is very hard and sad for just 3 ladies a dog and 2 cats :( dealing with a mother who is dying, working for living, etc.

HpS - Sharing a house with others?

My mom is barely moving, I even do not understand what she is saying, she told me yesterday that her condition is a torture, yesterday she cried, that broke my heart. I know that we are not these bodies, I am always praying to Krsna that He ends up with her suffering soon, pretty soon.

HpS - I would suggest that she is very directly under Krsna's attention. Of course, we want our independence so how much can He do. Death is the sum total of all bad experiences. Relief from distress is creation of distress. Accept what is happening and help her use it. Toward liberation.

As I told U through whatssapp, it seems that I need a surgery on my right knee, I have lots of fear for that, I am looking for a second opinion. But I have to wait until next wednesday. Besides the surgery is not cheap. mmm. I know that others suffer in different ways, but this time astrologically is the worst for me.

ASA - Donkey maintenance! We had to have complete physical giving blood etc. yesterday.

My mom is not in the condition to pray, how can I get the enthusiasm to pray? How can I feel calm and not nervous or sad most of the time?

HpS - She can hear. What will she hear? Nice stories from the KRSNA book! Read them and extract them.

Tomorrow I will try to join FMP, I hope to have the opportunity to take your association this time you came to Payroo.

On the other hand, I am giving a new course at the University:

Environmental Education, in which I have the opportunity to preach about vegetarianism, one group of my students went to a veggie restaurant and took some pictures, others are recycling, I feel very good teaching that course.

Sorry Gurudeva I am not a good example.

HpS - You are not perfect, but you are really pretty good! Become perfect. Unless you become perfect how will the other two ladys, dog and cats and ... students and relatives and church and whoever Krsna sends on the bus... become perfect.

I found an old photo of my family the four of us. That made me wonder

Yesterday one friend told me that the best way to honor my parents is to always move on. Nevertheless these days I do not know how.

Hope to see U tomorrow

Your servant

Candramukhi dd

HpS - Thank you!!!!